03-01-14(2:22:17)

May 7th, 2016 by NIA

My daughter Kayla Nicole was born 12/09/2013-my precious baby was 2.4 lbs- she was only given my breastmilk/ Kayla was diagnosed with NEC 12/22-she had to have 2 surgeries-after surgery 2-me and her father were waiting in the waiting area with my other 2 children eating a snack-i was very hopeful, i knew she was a fighter- but the doctor came and gave me the worst possible news anyone in the world could have ever given me ” Im sorry but there’s nothing else we could do, all of it was infected, and she can not survive without her intestnes.” My heart dropped, that day me and my husband stayed by her bedside and we held her until her very last breath. Earlir before the surgery she squeezed my finger and peeked at me consistency, and as she died in our arms that was all i could remember were those gorgeous eyes peeking at her hopeful and faithful mommy-I buried my baby christmas eve- and it felt horrible like a nightmare i never wanted to be in, I wish someone or GOD could have saved my baby, she made me complete, GOD made sure my baby had no possible way she could be with her family, Ive been through denial, hate, grief, sadness, hate again, dont know who to blame, why me, why my baby, why? why? why? I sat in my kitchen some nights and just stared at the wall and cried and asked GOD to send my baby back. but i knew that was impossible, IF GOD blesses me with millions I will most definitely put it into finding a cure or alternative for precious babies with NEC

I love you forever and will see you in Heaven one day
Kayla Nicole Dec 9-Dec 23 2013
From Mommy and Daddy and your 2 big sisters

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